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Before I tell you “the one thing”.

I would love your help with next week’s topic about time. Please hit <<reply>> and tell me: What’s your biggest time-related struggle? Let’s tackle this together and make next week’s blog super helpful for you! Don’t forget to hit <<reply>>. Thanks, friend!

OK, so what is this one thing that makes time so stressful?! 

Judgement 🌩️

I’m not talking about how others judge you; I’m talking about how YOU judge you.

How do I know? Well, I have a story for that.

Did I ever tell you I won a light-hearted award at work last year? My colleagues voted and awarded me the “I have a story for that” award. haha

I spent most of today rudely judging myself for how I spent my day. 

I haven’t been sleeping well. My husband had surgery on his shoulder last Tuesday (he’s doing okay. Recovering), and he’s been sleeping on the sofa downstairs. I have been sleeping with the bedroom door open to hear if he needs something. Many people sleep with an open bedroom door, but there is a side effect in my house. 

The side effect is named Basil, and he is our newest and most playful cat. 

He’s been so excited to get into the room at night that he has been having an absolute party 🥳 every night. 

He walks around on my back, bangs his face into my face, burrows his way under the blanket beside me, and attacks my feet. Then, after he lays down for half a nano-second, he gets up and walks on my face and onto my nightstand, then jumps up onto the bed’s headboard and goes over to my husband’s side. He jumps down onto a radio and accidentally turns it on. I grumpily turn it off as he wanders to the chair next to the window and bats around the pull string on our blinds for a while. When he’s bored, he returns to my head and repeats the whole cycle. 

After four days of this, finally, last night at 3 AM, I put him out of the bedroom and closed the door. 🚪😼

I proceeded to lay there berating myself over what a dummy I was for tolerating the cat antics for as long as I did. 

I woke up at 6 AM today with no alarm and felt so grumpy about not sleeping well. I blamed myself for ruining what could have been a productive Sunday, and then I went back to sleep. 

When I opened my eyes for the second time, it was already past 9 AM. I immediately got upset with myself and called myself lazy. 

I made my coffee and breakfast and sat on the sofa. I was still tired. I was supposed to be doing weekend chores, but instead, I spent time on my social media accounts scrolling dumb posts and videos, and the whole time, I felt shame and guilt for wasting time on a pointless activity.

Then I got up and emptied the dishwasher, collected eggs from the chicken coop – and remembered that we were out of chicken feed. This was another excuse to beat myself up for not remembering to go to the feed store yesterday. I was “supposed” to.

I went to the basement and rode the stationary bike for 20 minutes before I left to buy chicken feed. I was mad because I shamed myself for wasting my whole week and not doing my daily exercise as planned, so I punished myself while exercising today. 

When I got home from the feed store, I had lunch and sat down to read, but instead of reading, I dozed off. When I woke up, I judged myself again. “Sheesh, Ellen, you are so lazy!”.

I went upstairs and did a load of laundry and then spent more time on the sofa, wasting time. I was supposed to be reading, but I kept getting distracted.

And I was thinking about writing this blog. I should have drafted it yesterday, and I didn’t. So now I am writing it. It feels like I am behind, and I’m worrying about getting it done. But I am also realizing that today’s story is the PERFECT way to demonstrate how we create so much anxiety for ourselves by judging how we spend our time.

<blog writing intermission …. I hear dishes in the kitchen, and my husband is not supposed to do things with his right arm in a sling. Oh my gosh, it’s 4:55 already?!  I should be making dinner! Urgh, where did this day go?! So now I’m in the kitchen, and Matt has started preparing things for dinner. He didn’t mind me taking over, and I am getting dinner into the oven. It’s in the oven now with a timer while I finish this blog. end-intermission>

The truth is that today was a very nice relaxing Sunday. 

My weekend story is so much better when I let go of judgment. I have an adorable, playful cat that is sometimes a pest at night, but I can close a bedroom door. I was able to sleep in today. I relaxed on the sofa with coffee and a little social media. I rode my stationary bike to get some exercise and then went to buy chicken feed. When I got home, I had a simple, yummy lunch and even took a short nap. I wrote my weekly blog and finished it while dinner was in the oven. And this evening, I have time to watch a movie with Matt and get to bed early. I am also realizing that this cat we have is adorable. If I’m honest with myself, I didn’t close the door until last night because I thought having him in the room with me was cute. Tonight, I’ll close him out of the room, though. I do want a good night’s sleep.

Do you judge yourself for how you use your time? What would your story look like if you let go of the judgment?

Have a great week! And don’t forget to hit reply and spill the beans about your biggest time-related struggle. 

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Here is how my goals are going.

Exercise: Once again, I did not do very well with my exercise goal, having exercised twice out of 7 days.  This will be a better week.

One-on-One Fun: Did I have one-on-one fun with my family this week? It was hard this week because my husband had surgery – but I did spend a bunch of one on one time with the family including my parents and my parents-in-law.

Hustle or anti-hustle? This week, 4 of 7 days, did not feel frantic. Surgery in the family injects a little bit of frantic into life. I feel like I met the goal this week due to extenuating circumstances.

Reading? I finished the last 100 pages of the easy to read mystery, and have moved on to Ezra Klein’s “Why we’re polarized”. I’m 42 pages in.