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In our recent discussions, we’ve explored what and who to ask for help. Let’s focus on ‘how’ to ask to ensure we do it right.

Common Mistakes to Avoid:

Assuming: Don’t expect others to automatically know you need help, like thinking someone will do the dishes just because they see them. Be clear about what needs to be done.

Ambiguity: Avoid vague requests. Clearly state what needs to be done, who should do it, and by when.

Commanding: Requests work better than commands, especially in environments that value autonomy. Allow room for others to decline gracefully.

Effective Ways to Ask for Help:

Be Plainspoken: Communicate clearly that you need help, why it’s necessary, and the impact of the task.

Be Specific: Detail exactly what needs to be done to avoid confusion and ensure you get the help that solves your problem.

Make Requests, Not Demands: Give people the chance to say no. This respects their autonomy and increases the likelihood of a committed effort if they agree.

Asking for help effectively strengthens relationships and improves outcomes for everyone. If you do this right, you’ll be more likely to avoid a situation where someone does not meet your expectations.


– Ellen

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